Dogs Die in Hot Cars – Please Describe Yourself

 

 

 Ok, Before you get turned off by the name of this band, I beg you to read the rest of the review. Theres plenty more to get turned off by other than that.

 While the name Dogs Die in Hot Cars connotates some type of Satan worshiping, animal sacrificing, viking hard rock group, taking a quick listen to the CD will give you quite a surprise. Please Describe yourself is full of new wave guitars, keyboards, and probably haircuts that would make “Flock of Seagulls” jealous. All the tracks are very upbeat, somewhat dance-y and electric. My personal favorites include the single “I Love you cause I have to” and “Godhopping”.

The Lyrics are somewhat questionable. Why would anyone want Paul Newman’s eyes? I sat and wondered if they wrote this under the influence of some sort of drugs, just jotting down what ever words sounded good in a psychedelic haze. I’m pretty sure that they are genuinely fucked up.

If anything, they will always serve as a public reminder. Roll your windows down a bit so Spot can get some air!

Rating: 3.5 Stars

Notable Tracks: “I love you cause I have to” “Lounger”

Jazz June – Breakdance Suburbia

 

Alright kids, Listen up. This album is a perfect example of why you singers need to step up to the mic and enunciate your words properly.

From what I’ve read, Breakdance Suburbia is the Jazz June’s 1999 release of b-sides and rarities. but J.J. obviously forgot rule number one when releaseing a b-sides: You have to have songs on a REAL album that people have heard of, and you have to be a popular band.

Now, I personally never bothered to listen to any of their real tracks after listening to this album, mainly because I fear its not going to be far off from what I heard on this one. Every single song on B.S. suffers from sypha-singertoofarawayfrommicrophone-itis-disease. I think that if the singer wasn’t screaming into the studio from the building next door, I may have been able to understand the themes and story behind the songs (although it was highly apropriate for the track “Bleach in your eyes” because thats what I imagine what I would sound like if I have bleach in my eyes.)

Rating: 2 Stars for the effort. Thanks for coming.